Month: July 2021

I Can Feel the Days, Getting Shorter

John Winkelman

books received in the week of July 18, 2021

It’s mostly in the morning that I can feel the days getting shorter. The cats wake me up every morning right at the stroke of 5:00, and after feeding them I go out on the porch and practice chi kung and tai chi. As we move away from the solstice and towards the equinox, I notice the birds are a little quieter, the eastern sky a little darker. Venus, however, arrives at about the same time every morning, peeking over the edge of my neighbor’s roof.

The truly hot summer weather has arrived, and I am beginning to feel the anxiety, specific to my high school and college  years, of summer vacation being more than half-over, and so much yet to do.

(Narrator: He didn’t really have much yet to do.)

The only new addition to the library is the new book by George Saunders, A Swim in a Pond in the Rain, which was a total impulse buy from Amazon as a reward for also buying a pile of supplies for the house and for Zyra’s business. I have never read any Saunders, but I have been aware of him for many years, and the idea of using Russian short stories to explore the arts of reading and writing appeals to me.

(And yes, reading is an art.)

Speaking of, I am almost done with The Road Home, and still loving it. Looking back, I don’t think I have re-read this book in at least fifteen years, and possibly longer.

I am past the halfway point of Automating Inequality, and should have it complete by the end of the month.

In writing news, I took some time this past week to clean out my list of calls for submission to various anthologies and themed issues, and went looking for a few new venues. I mention this not because it means I have been writing, but because I did anything writing-related at all, and that is a definite win for what was otherwise a deeply stressful week.

A Month Into Summer

John Winkelman

Books arrived in the week of July 11, 2021

As I write this post I am on the last day of my two-week vacation, and I feel like I have relaxed enough, finally, that I could enjoy a vacation. And I will hold that thought front and center when I log in to my work computer bright and early tomorrow morning. I could make a long post about how a stay-cation in the age of COVID feels, compared to any other vacation in any other year, but I fear such a post would quickly devolve into petulance and whining.

Only one new book arrived this week: Michael J. Sullivan‘s new novel Nolyn, fresh from his (extremely) successful Kickstarter campaign. I had the good fortune of meeting Sullivan at ConFusion 2019 (or maybe 2018), through Dyrk Ashton, who knew Michael from the vibrant self-published fantasy community (to which I might one day belong, if I ever finish writing something).

In reading news, I am still working my way through Automating Inequality, and I still have to stop reading about every ten pages in order to let my blood cool down. I can’t remember the last time a book angered me so much and so frequently. Then again, considering the books I have been reading over the past three years, I feel this way quite a lot.

I am about two thirds of the way through Jim Harrison’s The Road Home, and it stands up to the test of time, though I am not enjoying it as much as I did Dalva. This is not to say I am not enjoying the read; far from it. The Road Home is one of the best books I have read in the last few years. But Dalva is better.

In writing news… tune in next week. Or the week after.

The Failure Mode of Vacation is Ennui

John Winkelman

Reading Material acquired in the week of July 4, 2021

I mean, I had a vacation, technically, back in the last full week of May, but I was still recovering from 2020 at the time, so it was more like attempting to reel myself back to myself after a year of dissociating. And the five weeks of work which followed were fairly stress-free, as far as work goes.

But the first week of my two-week vacation was kind of…I can’t really call it a waste of time, but I spent most of it binge-watching TV and playing video games, and staring at all the things in my life which require my attention, and for every single one of those tasks, I considered the work carefully, then said fuck it and went back to playing Diablo II.

I’m doing my best to not kick myself for wasting a week in which I could have been reading and writing. I did manage to spend some time out of doors, which did me a world of good, but the whole point of having time off was to be productive, and that I most surely was not.

However, even in the midst of this psychological malaise, there are some bright spots; to wit: four new bundles of words arrived at the Library of Winkelman Abbey in the past week.

First up is the latest issue of Pulphouse Magazine, to which I will one day submit a story, if I ever complete a short story.

The next three are the latest publications from Zombies Need Brains, from their recently-completed Kickstarter campaign – Derelict, When Worlds Collide, and The Modern Deity’s Guide to Surviving Humanity. This is the third of ZNB’s Kickstarters I have backed, and the first to which I have not submitted a story. 2020 was kind of a lousy year in that way.

In reading news, I finished Dalva and moved on to Harrison’s follow-up novel The Road Home. I hadn’t intended to spend my vacation re-reading old favorites, but that is where my mind is right now, and my life seems to be improved thereby.

I also finished Francisco Verso’s Nexhuman (Apex Book Company), which was quite good, and one of the very few “salvagepunk” novels I have read. In fact, the only other ones I can think of at the moment are the Bas-Lag trilogy by China Mieville.

In writing news, not much has changed, though I am putting together a list of upcoming calls for submission to themed anthologies. Maybe one of these will break me out of my funk.

IWSG, July 2021

John Winkelman

Welcome to the monthly Insecure Writer’s Support Group post. This month’s question is the following:

What would make you quit writing?

Short answer: Nothing or death.

Long answer: The heat death of the universe, were it to occur within the natural span of my life. Or something like that. I may take breaks now and again, but writing is what I do.

And for any of you who are dealing with a dry spell, remember: There is no such thing as a “former” writer; only a writer who is currently (and temporarily!) inactive. Writing (or whatever your passion may be) is the best of things, but sometimes the mundane world intrudes, and sometimes you just need a break. Barring an event which compromises you in such a way that you can no longer form thoughts in your head, you can still write. Writing is not a physical exercise; it is the creation of realities using the power of your mind, and as long as that faculty exists, you are still a writer. You need never put pen to paper or pixel to screen, and you are still a writer.

And should you lose the ability to create these realities, remember: the fact that you once wrote can never be taken away. Events are the only truly permanent things in the universe. The last copy of a book may be lost, but the fact that the book was ever written is forever a part of the history of the universe. Causality only happens in one direction. Manuscripts don’t burn.

 

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Halfway Through 2021

John Winkelman

Books which arrived in the week of June 27, 2021

For the first Independence Day weekend in the last decade, our block was not blown up by the obnoxious neighbor lighting off a thousand dollars of professional-grade fireworks in the middle of the street. I realize I may be jinxing the neighborhood by writing this in the early afternoon of July 4. After all, the day ain’t over yet.

To make up for the uninterrupted and quiet night, I had a bout of serious insomnia which had me sitting at the dining room table until 04:00, blearily browsing the internet in an attempt to get my head to quiet down. I was tired but not sleepy, which is a miserable state in which to find one’s self when there are no pressing issues the next morning and sleep should be abundantly available.

Two new bundles of words arrived in the past week. On the left is the latest issue of Poetry Magazine. On the right is the new delivery from And Other Stories, Keeping the House by Tice Cin, which according to the back cover blurb offers “…a fresh and funny take on the machinery of the North London Heroin Trade…” which I can only assume will create for me a sense of deja vu which will lead back to Trainspotting.

(Yes, I know, Keeping the House is set in London, England and Trainspotting is set in Edinburgh, Scotland.)

In reading news, I finished Jim Harrison‘s Dalva, and it was every bit as beautiful as the previous half-dozen times I have read it over the past 25 years. Harrison’s follow-up novel The Road Home is now sitting next to my bed, awaiting my attention. I picked up my copy of Dalva back around 1996 and it is falling apart. I think I will need to replace it before I read it again, and I don’t think it will be so easy to find another copy with a Russell Chatham cover which is in any sort of good condition.

I have just started Francesco Verso’s long novella or short novel Nexhuman, and so far it is really good! This was published by Apex Book Company and arrived a few months ago as part of my subscription to Apex’s catalog.

I also just started Automating Inequality: How High-Tech Tools Profile, Police, and Punish the Poor by Virginia Eubanks, and only made it about five pages in before I was overcome with an incandescent rage at the state of the world. I have often said that sadism is the national pastime of the USA, and Eubanks is showing how sadism and racism, manifested as carceral capitalism and managed democracy, are actively embedded into the national psyche at a level not much removed from that of the weather or gravity. Currently I am about fifty pages in, and my mood has not improved.

Argh.

In writing news, now that we are in July, and I have some time off, I plan to get serious about my writing practice. Then again I have planned that every week since the beginning of the year and have only been partially successful.

A few walks in the woods and a few evenings on the Lake Michigan beaches may be what I need to clear space in my head.

June 2021 Reading List

John Winkelman

Book I Read in June 2021

Considering how busy I was in June, this is not a bad reading list. I had a good mix of genres, with fantasy, poetry, critical theory, and literary fiction in the mix. I could have maybe snuck in one more book, but the mix of work scheduler and stress, life stress, family stress, and general burnout kept me from enjoying my free moments as well as I could have.

If you look closely, you will see that my copy of Dalva is quite worn. Both front and back covers are attached by the tiniest remnant of the original adhesive, and the pages within are quite yellowed. I purchased this copy when I worked at Schuler Books and Music, sometime around 1996 or 1997, I think. So it’s at least 20 years old. I have read it at least half a dozen times, and loaned it out twice. All the damage to the book was done by me, hauling the book on vacation and to various cafes and offices over the years. I love this book unreservedly, and will likely pick up a replacement copy sometime this year.

As with last month, I didn’t read any short fiction. This is beginning to bother me, and as I have a two-week vacation coming up, I will do my best to set aside time to correct this omission.

Books

  1. Harrow, Alix – The Ten Thousand Door of January (2021.06.12)
  2. Liem, Tess – Obits. (2021.06.15)
  3. Pike, J. Zachary – Son of a Liche (2021.06.24)
  4. Tiqqun, The Cybernetic Hypothesis (2021.06.24)
  5. Harrison, Jim – Dalva (2021.06.28)